Dude, your passion is dying, have you noticed?
You've become best friends and that's about it. Do things together, eat, laugh, joke, sometimes too much, your space is also his space and vice versa, there are no more secrets, because isn't it ?, in a relationship there should be no secrets. Everything must be visible, even when you epilate, when you put on make-up, when you write on Facebook, but with whom you write and why you write, who is that and who is that, why do you look at that, but why look at that.
When people are in a relationship since they don't even remember when, they forget to seduce, they forget to approach, they forget what it's like to go out on a date or how to talk and behave with someone new. Surely it happened to you to get out of a relationship, to come the time to go out with someone and to feel doubtful, you don't know what to do, what to say, it's like you have two left hands and you stutter. Forgetting all this, forgetting to seduce their partner, they lose their preference for the game in a lethargic banality, they go like this with the relationship and the relationship goes with them limping, as if they no longer have an identity, any initiative is apathetic and out of inertia. The clothes are no longer chosen to fit but only to wrap, you don't put as much value on how you look, because no, you're there, it's comfortable and warm, no one chooses you anyway and you don't have to impress anyone. What if you imagined that you are no longer in a relationship and you should learn to talk again, to behave, maybe lose weight or what do you do when you leave the relationship? What do you think would be your partner's reaction?
Love is there, but when people get used to it, they don't even hear the hell, because they are busy making room to breathe or to find their identities, personalities. To reproach and change each other, when in fact everyone should become the whole devil again, to allow themselves to step back into civilization, to put on the right clothes and regain their confidence, to allow and to give they allowed each other to look left and right, to be admired and complimented, without fear of being deceived. I read somewhere that in a long relationship you either fall in love with the person you are with or you fall in love with someone else, you learn again from the outside what it's like to be full of life, to care what you look like for someone and want to seduce, and then bring that into your relationship. It sounds harsh and crazy, but I think there can be a middle ground without necessarily cheating. Or you can wake up like that one morning, get angry and say that today you want to be very cool, fall in love with yourself and start doing things for yourself.
Relationships begin to work again when partners go beyond the state of preservation, in which everyone is busy avoiding reproach and feeling devalued, when everyone begins to turn their attention to themselves, to look in the mirror and to look at each other. feel good about him. Only then, when you start to love yourself again, to flourish, to make people turn their heads after you on the street because you smile and emanate vitality, then your partner will feel again that it is time to do the same. Involuntarily and unconsciously we are attracted to happy, energetic and lively people. We want to seduce and let ourselves be seduced, but this cannot happen between two people who no longer know their value, because seduction loses its purpose. And where there is no seduction, there is no more sexuality. Where there is no sexuality, there is no creativity, no spontaneity, no vital energy. It's a "meh" that pushes you forward in life.
Do you think that relationships go by themselves? Love passes and with it passes passion. That is the nature of things on this earth: ephemerality. But no one said the same things could not happen several times. Leave the relationship, do not aim to save a relationship, because it is not the problem, fall in love with yourself and everything else will move on its own. Then, be smarter or smarter and, cleverly, extinguish the reproaches with beautiful gestures, which you will trust to do, as soon as you get up from where you had a bad opinion of yourself. Break the routine with astonishment, soothe, ignore the harsh words and silence them with kisses and caresses. Play with the other person's mind in a pleasant way and they will all be resurrected. Take the reins and see what comes out. Never change for someone, change for yourself. You are not annoyed by the change, you are annoyed that the person next to you does not love you unconditionally and asks you to do it. Just like you, in turn, do. But before you react, ask yourself every time: is this change, honestly and objectively speaking, for my benefit?
Remember that a noisy crowd is not silenced by screaming, but by appealing to other senses. She calms down gradually, if you speak more slowly, trying, out of curiosity, to hear what you are saying. If you move his attention from the problem, or you catch the attention of one who will ask the other to calm down and so on until you have all the attention. In the same way you extinguish the dissatisfaction of the other, it is enough to shake one in a different way than you would have done before.
